She Wasn’t My Plan, but She Was His.

As Mother’s Day is approaching I thought long and hard about this post. This post is raw and I ask that you give me grace if you do not understand the honesty I bring you with my words.

Motherhood scared me to the core. There are many times I look at her and wonder what I ever did to deserve her. Sometimes I think back to the early stages of my pregnancy and a very large lump gathers in my throat  because I was so lost. I had no clue who I was. There were many times when I voiced my fear about being “mom” that people looked at me a little strange, which made me feel even more so that something was truly wrong with me.

Let’s face it, if you’re a woman, motherhood is just something that’s supposed to come naturally to you. But it didn’t for me.

I can remember being six months pregnant sitting in my bed sobbing to my husband because I was terrified. I was completely disconnected from my pregnancy. I was terrified to be a mom, and through the tears I managed to get out that I wasn’t sure I’d be a good one.

Emelia entered the world with a dramatic entrance on June 29, 2013 and my life was forever changed. When I say I had to hit rock bottom before I could see in retrospect God’s plan that’s not an exaggeration. As I struggled with depression through my pregnancy it exploded after giving birth.

As I look back now it’s so clear. As I look back now, while in the complete dark at the time, I can see a light poking through. I can see God’s plan. I can see His lesson(s). I can see His gifts. His teachings. I can see Him so vividly, I can see all of those things when I look at her.

My greatest fear has turned out to be one of the greatest lessons of my life. The greatest gift of my life. She is exactly where I see Jesus. Where I ran to Him. Where I was found. Where I received grace. Where I received forgiveness. Where the rest of this life just makes sense.

She is truly the most beautiful human being I am so undeserving of.

When I look at her I see kindness, compassion, and a heart so lovely that it could only have been made that way by my Heavenly Father who knitted her together.

She is in many ways my opposite but in so many my mini. She has dusted pink and purple glitter all over my life and leaves me sticker reminders everywhere I turn in this neutral loving zone I try my best to live in.

She has shown me that life isn’t black and white. In fact, it’s in those unknown grey areas where you will see true beauty beyond your imagination.

She is my best friend. The light of my life. The best thing that has ever happened to me. She saved me and I will spend the rest of my life thanking God for her and devoting myself to being the best mom I can be for her.

She wasn’t my plan. But she was His. I see it so clearly now. I see His beautiful plan unfold in her every day of my life.

We plan, God laughs.

His plans are far greater than our wildest dreams.

My sweet, Emelia Brynn, I love you so.

Thank you for making me Mama.

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She Wasn’t My Plan, but She Was His.

Mother’s Day Gift Guide

I’ve put together a special mother’s day gift guide! All gifts under $200 for the special lady or ladies in your life!

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Free People may have a pretty price tag  but it’s worth every penny with the quality that is offered! These Royale Flats are the perfect go to option for the crazy season  changes we have here in Indiana and these have been on the major wish list for a while now!

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 I definitely have this on the list to purchase for a special lady in my life this Mother’s Day.  Plus who doesn’t love Chip & Joanna Gaines? I’ve heard so many amazing reviews about this read! I cannot wait to bless a special lady in my life with this!

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I’ve eyed Jord watches for some time now.  They are the perfect go to item to complete your outfit and so full of beautiful character! How gorgeous is this Jord Frankie watch? Sign me up!

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This affordable Mossimo mini back pack from Target is the perfect purse to grab and go! I might have to just buy myself this one, for under $30, I’ll take it! Target for the win

<yet again>.

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Buy a gift from a company with so much heart behind their products! The Shine Project is a place where students come after school to hand make your jewelry. Over 40 scholarships have been given since 2011, and 100% of donations given to the non profit go directly to the students. Not to mention these customizable “mom” mantra necklaces are just perfect!  Shop now <here>.

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My soon-to-be sister-in-law introduced me to this product over the weekend and I placed a pre-order already! At just $22 this is an amazing gift to bless someone with this Mother’s Day! On each page of the Cultivate Journal you get a selection of specially-selected key verses to write out, along with space to write  thoughts, prayers, or whatever God places on the heart! <thanks Lolo>.

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I hope you’ve enjoyed the gift guide! Wishing all of you mamas or buyers for your moms a very Happy Mother’s Day filled with family and love!

xo,

Kate

 

Mother’s Day Gift Guide

Tuesday Thrift Finds

Tuesdays are our thrift mornings and it has become a ritual over here to grab my Dunkin coffee and my sweet girl her 5 little munchkins as we venture out in search of one of a kind finds.

It’s become one of my favorite parts of my week and I cannot believe the true treasure we have found.

I got this shelf for $4. Yes you read that right. Just $4.

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A little Rethunk Junk paint makeover and its transformed into this sweet little beauty by our front door. Like most pieces in our house I chose the color, Cotton when giving this piece a little TLC.

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Add a little vase with a flower and there you have it!

And for the money I saved on this shelf, I can buy many more iced coffees for the week so I’m definitely winning over here.

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One girl’s junk, another girl’s treasure!

My hubby’s not too crazy about Tuesdays –but hey–happy wife, happy life!

Have a  blessed week!

xo,

Kate

Tuesday Thrift Finds

Five Affordable Farmhouse Chandeliers

One of my biggest regrets back when we first purchased this house was rushing when choosing lighting.

After changing multiple lights out and wasting a little bit of money I’ve finally allowed myself to slowly purchase items and feel confident about it rather than buying on impulse and regretting later.

We lived with a hole in our kitchen ceiling for about 2 1/2 months while I waited for the chandelier to hang over our space. The wait was worth it. It always is.

Truth be told though, lighting can be EXPENSIVE. I just can’t afford a $500 chandelier no matter how beautiful or perfect it may be.

Shopping on a budget and waiting for the sale has been key for me in the last few months. I’ve put together 5 different faves all under $300! All affordable and oh so pretty!

  1. First up is this Mindy 3 Light Wood Bead Chandelier. We have this exact one hanging in our bedroom above our bed and I love it. It has beautiful, natural, wood beads that hang with a golden, bronze finish!

photo-72. Another wood + metal chandelier option for you! I love how feminine this light is and it’s sure to soften up any space! Can you imagine this in a nursery? So pretty!

photo-63. I may or may not have this vintage beauty on my wish list! I’m thinking this will be a perfect fit for my daughter’s room !  I’ll stare at this beauty for a few more months before I make up my mind for sure, but for now, she’s pretty to look at. And at just under $300 I may have to watch  and hope for a Lowes sale! Yes this beauty is from Lowes!

photo-44. This 5 Light Bronze Light would be beautiful over a kitchen island! A large island is definitely something I wish we would have worked into the design of our house when we purchased! Again, another lesson I’ve added to the list during this fixer upper learning experience. Such simplistic, beauty this would add to any space.

photo-55. I love all the soft curves on this World Market Wire Chandelier! Not to mention, this is priced at $169.99 with almost a 5 star rating. You can use code SUNFUN right now for an additional 20% off your order + you get free shipping with a $150 purchase!

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Thanks for reading through all my affordable chandelier faves! Hope you enjoyed browsing as much as I do!

xo,
Kate

 

 

Five Affordable Farmhouse Chandeliers

Bedroom Sign Art Love

I love shopping small and when I saw these signs from Hunt & Gather Goods I couldn’t wait to purchase.

I think like many things, certain art or words can just give a room all the feels.

I’ve waited two years to find the perfect piece or pieces to go above our bed and I couldn’t be happier with how these have completed this part of our bedroom.

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My sister-in-law asked me recently how many signs in a house is too many? My answer was a quick–“There are never too many.”

I love them as much as I love lighting {post to come about that} and I love supporting other businesses while I shop.

Maggie from Hunt & Gather Goods has so many more options to complete your room and  her handmade farmhouse goods are the perfect pieces to give your home all the cozy feels.

And you know I love me some cozy spaces!

Plus these two! Swooning! A girl and her dog.

The bed might not be perfectly fluffed but there were lots of cuddles to make up for it.

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xo,

Kate

Headboard: handmade by my father-in-law

Quilt: Similar <here>

Sheets: Target

Chandelier: Overstock

Signs: Hunt & Gather Goods

Bedroom Sign Art Love

Grace on West

Welcome to Grace on West and thank you for reading!

My prior blog and a prior chapter expired last month and I took some time to reflect to where I felt called next.

I can feel the changes coming ahead for me I know the most important thing will be dedicating more time to my family and home life.

So speaking of home–

We purchased our home as a foreclosure almost two years ago, looking at just two homes in search for our next chapter.

One being a totally remodeled, move- in ready home-

The other was this house. Vacant for three years and needing more work than most could wrap their minds around.

From the moment that house became ours a whole new journey unfolded for me. One of my greatest hopes is that when people walk in my house they feel a peace that can only be explained by the Holy Spirit’s presence filling these rooms.

A house that was once anything but lovely. A house that was once anything but wanted.

“Blessed are those who see beautiful things in humble places where other people see nothing.”

The Lord lead me to this place with my family. He placed us here and this was His plan for us. His plan will always be greater than mine. His grace is what has carried us every moment in this life.

He lead us to this little place on West Street.

Grace on West.

And that is where the name and the heart of this blog comes from.

I look forward to documenting our home space and the cozy corners of life with you.

xo,

Kate

Grace on West